Shifting gears with your relationship

Tips on how to recalibrate a relationship in flux. 

• Meditate or write in your journal to work out your true feelings about the change.
• If applicable, try to ‘match’ the change; do something that lifts you attitudinally, physically or psychologically.
• Get out of the rut of talking about the same things and pick new conversations. Author, Terri Orbuch, advocates the daily ‘10-minute rule’. In this time, you’re not allowed to talk about work, ‘life admin’, your children or relationship.
• Listen without interrupting.
• Don’t expect one person to fulfil all your relationship needs; female friendships are particularly important to women.
• Note why you’re grateful for the relationship/person.
• Express concerns as they come up; don’t let them fester.
• Let go of the view of what your relationship ‘should’ be, and see what it ‘could’ be.

Get more advice about your relationships here.

Photographs: iStock