Depression in men: 9 warning signs that are easy to miss – and when it’s time to seek help
Depression doesn't always look like persistent sadness. From irritability, exhaustion and social withdrawal to changes in sleep, libido and feelings of hopelessness, the signs can be difficult to recognise. Here's what to look out for, why men's mental health can go overlooked and where to find support.
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Depression is one of the most common mental health illnesses people experience. In the US, 9 per cent of men report symptoms, and in the UK this climbs to 13 per cent. While there are statistics that report a larger proportion of women experience depressive symptoms, male statistics are often claimed to be underreported.
At the bleaker end of statistics, the Mental Health Foundation reports that three times as many men as women die by suicide in the UK, so there is a very real-world implication of depression in men, whether or not it is seen and treated. However, having an understanding of what symptoms are can help both the people experiencing depression and those around them to find a sense of comfort and power over a difficult situation. While depression is a highly specific and individual mental health condition, there are common themes and threads that we can keep in mind.
Feelings that can be associated with depression
Some of the earliest feelings people experiencing depression feel are hard to pin down. Numbness, flatness, and fatigue are some of them; a lack of energy generally tends to overcome people. There are sometimes links between depression and burnout for this reason. However, beyond these feelings of exhaustion and tiredness, darker feelings can start to emerge.
The mental health charity Mind lists the following as examples of where feelings and mood can move over time:
- Down, upset or tearful
- Restless, agitated or irritable
- Guilty, worthless and down on yourself
- Isolated and unable to relate to other people
- Finding no pleasure in life or things you usually enjoy
- Angry or frustrated over minor things
- A sense of unreality
- No self-confidence or self-esteem
- Hopeless and despairing
Behaviours that can be associated with depression
A low mood persisting over time can also lead to people changing their behaviour. Men commonly find their libido decreases; their sleep changes (both insomnia and hypersomnia) can occur; as can being generally foggy when thinking or speaking. Often, more dangerous behaviour such as increased substance use and forms of self-harm can occur too, as well as social avoidance. People even mention their body aching for no tangible reason.
Plenty of these behaviours and feelings can become a vicious circle. For instance, people can start to avoid social events due to their self-esteem and tiredness, which can in turn lead to the person feeling more isolated, which worsens symptoms.
Ideation that can be associated with depression
At its worst, of course, people can take their own lives as a result of depression. In the UK, this is the largest cause of death for men under the age of 50. But prior to this, ideation of harm, taking their own life, dying generally, or disappearing in some way (whether it’s leaving home or otherwise) are also common and can be very distressing and all-consuming.
These ideations impact roughly 40 to 75 per cent of people who have depression. While many depressive symptoms are gradual and hard to identify as depression, ideation can be a good indicator of a time when you may need to seek help or speak to someone.
Seasonal Affective Disorder is a form of depression
At this time of the year, many people experience seasonal affective disorder (SAD). SAD is now officially classed as a specific seasonal pattern of major depression and/or bipolar disorder in the DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). Many of the symptoms align with those above, and despite the idea of SAD being merely seasonal, it shouldn’t be ignored.
Effective treatments and places to find help for depressive symptoms
Depression is treatable, but it is complicated. Medication can be useful for helping people when they are moderately or severely depressed, but the trial and error of finding the right medication and dose can be destabilising for some. Across all forms of depression, therapy has also been shown to have directly successful results in about 60 per cent of cases.
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is seen in the UK’s health system as the most effective and commonly provided therapeutic treatment for depression, but talking therapies are also seen to be effective long-term treatments for many. Lifestyle can also have a positive impact on depression, with exercise and time spent outdoors (especially in nature) said to be beneficial. Medication should always be prescribed by a registered physician or qualified doctor. A combination of some or all of these can be more effective, particularly for moderate to severe cases of depression.
The other, so often overlooked aspect of depression, is that talking to friends, family, loved ones, and free helplines such as Samaritans in the UK and 988 in the US can help.
