Why people can feel unhappy during a weight loss journey
Often people who are aiming for a specific weight goal feel unhappy during the process, and when they hit the goal. We examine why.
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Wellbeing is complex. Sometimes, we can do everything right, and still find it hasn’t shifted how we feel. Successes, hard work, and persistence are honourable, but they don’t always result in happiness. Research across the last decade has consistently shown a link between dieting, and specifically weight loss, and low mood.
We live in a culture that puts pressure on body image, but for people aiming to achieve a specific weight goal, to feel unhappy upon reaching it is more common than we realise.
Why does low mood occur while losing weight?
The most important nuance here is that often healthy weight loss helps people to feel better – and that typically the way in which the weight loss is being achieved is the issue, not the actual result.
Quite a lot of physiological responses are at play during weight loss, or calorie deficit. “Cutting calories, especially quickly or drastically, can disrupt mood regulation,” explains Julie Boora, pharmacist and co-founder of women’s health platform TribElle. Blood sugar swings, which happen when cutting calories as the body has to readjust to receiving fewer carbohydrates, can trigger irritability and anxiety.
Additionally, “restrictive diets frequently fall short nutritionally,” Boora says. This can lead to a lack of B vitamins, omega-3 fatty acids, iron, and enough protein, among other deficiencies. All of which are vital for good cognitive function and mood regulation. This is why, if cutting calories, including if on GLP-1s, it is vital to then focus on nutrient-dense and protein-rich foods.
The other issue tends to be as a result of fatigue. Naturally, deficits can be tiring. They tend to involve more work on less fuel, whether that’s the headache of meal planning or literally spending more time in the gym. “Persistent hunger, fatigue, and disrupted sleep can reduce emotional resilience,” explains Gareth Strangemore-Jones, clinical lead at Mental Health Matrix.
What does it mean if we feel less happy at our target weight?
Alongside the general pressure of working toward a goal, having hit a target and feeling a lack of joy is also common. “There is a term called the ‘Arrival fallacy,’ which is the mistaken belief that reaching a goal will deliver lasting happiness,” says Boora. In fact, she explains that the brain’s reward chemistry is tied to the pursuit of a goal, not the having of it. Dopamine tends to be found in pursuit, not success.
In cases where weight goals are something we were hoping would bring happiness, it can also suggest that “the number on the scales was carrying expectations no number could fulfil,” Strangemore-Jones says.
People often see weight loss journeys as a solution for their dissatisfaction beyond health, even unconsciously. We have been sold narratives that weight loss can bring confidence, attractiveness, and success our entire lives – when this doesn’t manifest, it can feel like a promise was taken from us.
Weight loss doesn’t necessarily rewire our inner critic, either. “Somebody who has spent years monitoring perceived flaws, comparing themselves with other people, or speaking critically about their appearance may continue to do so in a smaller body,” says Strangemore-Jones, adding that “weight loss changes measurements, but it does not automatically rewrite self-esteem, shame or the mental habits through which somebody sees themselves.”
On a less intense, but still perfectly valid note, achieving a goal in life often removes the structure that was involved in achieving the goal. “The disorientation of no longer having a goal to aim for,” as Boora says, can cause people to feel unhappy. Setting a new goal before you reach the old one can help, provided it is healthy and not enabling anything restrictive to take hold.
When can therapy help?
While a therapist shouldn’t generally be giving nutritional advice, “therapy can help someone separate body weight from personal worth and examine what they believed weight loss would change,” says Strangemore-Jones. This may include exploring concepts such as self-esteem, control, perfectionism, shame, or emotion-related eating habits, though the list is not exhaustive.
It’s also important to consider the amount of weight loss, and whether dissatisfaction is related to an unhealthy relationship with food. Warning signs can include escalating restriction, intense fear around particular foods, compulsive exercise, avoiding social occasions involving food, bingeing, purging or feeling that any fluctuation on the scales represents personal failure. In these instances, it is worth seeking advice from organisations such as the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA) in the States, and the charity Beat Eating Disorders in the UK.
If weight loss has happened more unexpectedly along with low mood, this can be due to other psychological issues “such as depression, anxiety, stress, or grief,” Strangemore-Jones says. Again, in these instances, it can be that therapy is something to consider. When doing so, always look for an accredited therapist.
