“I was brought up conservative and cautious — then I tried magic mushrooms, and my life changed for good”

One dose of psilocybin opened Gail Thomas’s mind in ways she never expected — and it’s still shaping her life 12 years later.

Gail Thomas always thought she knew herself pretty well. Brought up in a cautious, conservative family in Oklahoma City, she grew up in Catholic schools, followed the rules, and considered psychedelics a terrifying, alien world. “I was pretty straight-laced in college. Kind of a nerd. Didn’t party much. I was scared of psychedelics, and no one ever offered them to me,” she recalls.

Finding a way back to normal

She became a lawyer, a writer, an actor, and a storytelling coach, working in New York and abroad. However, after surviving cancer,  Thomas found herself navigating the delicate path back to normal while coping with isolation and lingering anxiety. It was at this point she was invited to participate in an FDA study exploring psilocybin — the psychoactive compound in “magic mushrooms”— as a potential treatment for mental health. For a woman who had long avoided anything remotely experimental, the proposition felt almost comical. 

“Well, this was an FDA study, so I figured it had to be safe. If I was ever going to explore them, this would be the safest way to do them. The doctors weren’t going to let me jump off a roof — they supervised me every step of the way.”

She was no stranger to medical uncertainty. “About two years after my treatment ended, I was returning to ‘normal’ but feeling isolated from others when my nurse suggested I meet with Dr Stephen Ross, who was supervising the study. He was clearly an academic, as well as gentle and caring. I remember him looking deeply into my eyes and saying, ‘We will help you.’”

Seeing life as a “spiritual dinner table”

The session itself lasted six hours, and it transformed her in ways she could never have predicted. “There were many vivid dreamlike moments, from intense to comforting, surprising and joyful all at once. It was like a huge, overwhelming download of wisdom,” she says.

One vision in particular stayed with her: “I felt like I was floating over a circle that became sort of a spiritual dinner table, divided like pizza slices. The first thing at the table was cancer. I was like, ‘wow, cancer is just part of a bigger table.’ My family was at the table, and the Internal Revenue Service. The feeling was one of connectedness, how all of these little pieces of life are connected.”

During the experience, Thomas’s thoughts expanded beyond her personal life. “I had this sense that all the things I’d worried about — past mistakes, future anxieties — were tiny threads in a much larger fabric. It wasn’t that problems disappeared. It was that I felt connected to everything, as if I could finally see the whole tapestry instead of just one frayed edge.”

Long-lasting effects and new insights

The effects didn’t fade after the session. “The therapy gave me a deep understanding that I’m part of a bigger whole, fostering greater empathy for myself and others. While the initial euphoria eventually wore off, I now have an understanding that I’m not separate, and that while life has good and bad things, it is a precious miracle to even be alive,” she explains. 

Even ordinary moments felt different: “There was a moment in a cab coming back from the trip. I was still high, feeling an extreme thrill simply to see two women sitting in a cafe. I felt a childlike joy just noticing these friends together… less afraid, more in my body.”

For Thomas, this wasn’t a casual experiment — it was a doorway. “It opened my mind to a broader, more spiritual perspective and helped me feel truly connected to others,” she says. Over a decade later, she continues to draw from that day in her work, performing her solo dark comedy show Patient 13, which revisits the insights of that transformative experience. “Maybe things that happen aren’t good or bad — they are just part of the table of life,” she reflects.

Lessons continue to ripple outwards

Thomas emphasises that the treatment was effective because they it was safe and guided. “I would apply the same decision-making process to taking medical psychedelics as with any other medical decisions. While I hope medical psychedelics become available for more people, it’s not the right treatment for everyone.”

The irony isn’t lost on her: she had once rejected aggressive cancer treatments, yet embraced a single dose of a psychedelic. “My crazy cancer journey taught me how to push back against the first doctor, ask questions, and find someone I could trust. When I met Dr. Ross, I immediately knew that I could trust him. Plus, the offer of free therapy before and after felt like winning the ‘cancer lottery.’ I’m a lucky, unlucky person,” she says.

“The lessons from that day continue to ripple through my life,” she says. “I notice things I used to ignore, I approach challenges differently. I laugh differently, I feel more alive.”

Gail Thomas will share her story in Patient 13 at the Edinburgh Fringe Zoo Playground this August

Words: Anne Fletcher, Images: Shutterstock