Taking Up Space

Recently, we got a new family car. It’s not our first seven-seater. We’ve driven one ever since our third child was born. Over the years, I’ve become accustomed to navigating school runs, family holidays, and supermarket car parks in a larger vehicle.

But this one feels different. It feels even bigger.

The first few times I drove it, I became acutely aware of its size. Narrow roads felt narrower. Parking spaces felt smaller. Every manoeuvre required a little more attention. I found myself driving cautiously, almost apologetically, trying not to take up too much room.

And then I realised something.

Perhaps it wasn’t just the car that felt bigger.

Perhaps I felt bigger too.

As I prepare to publish my first book, I am becoming aware of a different kind of visibility. For years, much of my work has happened in coaching conversations with individuals, and workshops with relatively small groups. Meaningful spaces, but often intimate ones.

Publishing a book feels different.

A book travels into places I cannot go. It introduces me to people I may never meet. It invites me to be seen in new ways.

And if I’m honest, that can feel both exciting and uncomfortable.

As someone who is relatively small in stature, I have spent much of my life unconsciously adapting to spaces designed for larger people. I can squeeze into corners. I make room for others. I avoid imposing. I step aside.

Most of the time, these behaviours are thoughtful and considerate.

But sometimes they become something else.

Sometimes they become a habit of shrinking.

Driving a larger vehicle has required me to learn something simple but important. The car isn’t too big. The road isn’t too small. I simply need to understand where the edges are.

I need to trust the space I occupy.

Not aggressively.

Not carelessly.

Not at the expense of others.

Just accurately.

And perhaps that is true for many of us.

Whether we are stepping into a new role, sharing our voice, launching a business, writing a book, becoming an empty nester, or entering a new season of life, there often comes a moment when we realise that staying safe by staying small is no longer serving us.

Taking up space is not about becoming louder.

It is not about demanding attention.

It is not about becoming someone we are not.

It is about becoming more fully ourselves.

It is about recognising that we have something worth contributing.

It is about allowing our strengths, values, experiences, and perspectives to be seen.

And it is about doing so without losing ourselves in the process.

The larger car has become an unexpected teacher.

Safety does not come from making myself smaller.

It comes from understanding the dimensions of who I am.

It comes from knowing where my boundaries are.

It comes from trusting that I can navigate unfamiliar roads.

And perhaps most importantly, it comes from recognising that taking up my space creates room for others to do the same.

As I prepare to share my work more widely through my first book, I am learning that visibility and wholeness are not opposites.

The goal is not to become bigger than I am.

The goal is not to shrink.

The invitation is to stay safe, stay whole, and take up the space that is already mine.

Reflection: Taking Up Space

As you think about the season of life you are currently navigating, consider:

1. Where am I making myself smaller than I need to be?
   What opportunities, conversations, or aspirations am I holding back from because it feels safer to stay unnoticed?
2. What space is life inviting me to step into?
   Whether in my work, relationships, leadership, or personal growth, where am I being called to show up more fully?
3. How can I stay both safe and whole as I do?
   What values, strengths, boundaries, and sources of support will help me navigate this next chapter without losing myself in the process?

Like learning to drive a larger car, taking up space isn’t about becoming bigger than you are.

It’s about understanding your dimensions, trusting your ability to navigate, and having the courage to occupy the space that is already yours.

Not shrinking.

Not taking over.

Simply becoming more fully yourself.

 

Thanks for being here.

I’m Sarah Cretegny, an Accredited Transitions Coach. I help individuals, groups and teams to navigate real life transitions without losing themselves.

I’m particularly effective when time is limited and the stakes are high. I draw on evidence-based coaching approaches, strengths expertise, and my lived experience of balancing leadership, family life, and international living. I’m deeply passionate about partnering with people to coach their wild, because the world needs more radically authentic leaders now more than ever.

I am based in Lausanne, Switzerland and coach virtually globally. Find my links: https://linktr.ee/discover.your.wild