Christmas; Finding Calm in the Chaos

In my Mindful Poetic Stories Podcast, December Christmas episodes, (Click Here to listen) I explore the deeper reasons behind holiday stress, Christmas anxiety, and why so many of us feel drained by the festive season. More importantly, I explore how to create a calm, meaningful, and mindful Christmas rooted in positive emotional intelligence and mental fitness.

The reflections in my poetic story in the podcast episode, Christmas; Like it, Love it or Hate it; are inspired by a conversation back in 2021 with someone who said they “hated Christmas.” But on reflection, what they really hated wasn’t the holiday; it was the hype, the consumerism, the expectations, and the emotional tension that creeps in each December. And they aren’t alone. Many experience the same pressures, experiencing the weight of overspending, overthinking, overcommitting and the emotional reactivity that comes from trying to create the “perfect Christmas.”

The truth is: most of us don’t hate Christmas, we hate the stress around it.

Years of expectations, social pressure and family dynamics can make the holiday feel like something to survive, rather than something to savour. For years, I felt the same. I avoided going home for Christmas because it brought exhaustion instead of connection. My lack of boundaries made everything feel heavier.

With the help of coaching and learning the power of positive intelligence, shifting my mindset, and building mental fitness, it changed everything.

I discovered that peace isn’t always found by escaping Christmas, it’s found through managing your inner world, even when things around you feel chaotic.

Acknowledging the chaos but embracing calm.

A key question I ask clients (and myself) during stressful times is simple but powerful:
“What am I feeding right now; what I want more of or what I want less of?”

Our thoughts, beliefs and habits shape your experience. This is the foundation of emotional awareness and the heart of a mindful Christmas.

Start with power pauses: short, intentional moments to breathe, ground yourself and check in with your emotional state. In the pauses, practice mindfulness exercises like conscious breathing, mindful eating, and short mindful walks in nature, which are proven to quickly regulate your nervous system and reduce Christmas anxiety.

Create emergency relaxation plans for yourself by identifying places and activities that restore your energy. For some, it’s nature. For others, music, movement, or simply stepping away for five mindful minutes. These small resets prevent overwhelm before it spirals.

Setting healthy boundaries is also essential for Christmas wellbeing. Protect your time, energy and finances by being honest about what you can commit to, without guilt.

And don’t underestimate the power of creativity.

In my Mindful Poetic Stories Podcast episode I share fun, connection-building activities, like a Christmas question box, nature photo challenges, or family writing contests or games, engage the imagination of the whole family to create your own meaningful memories without the stress of perfection or overspending.

KEY TAKEAWAYS;
Holiday Mental Fitness Practices
• The Power Pause: Ask yourself what you’re feeling right now, reflect and adjust.
• Intentional breathing: Try box breathing (4-4-4). Lots of breathing exercises can be found on YouTube.
• Emergency Relaxation Plan: Time in nature, a brisk walk, music, or mindful movement to reset your nervous system.
• Mindful Eating: Savour each bite of the delicious food on offer, taste, texture, temperature. Practice putting down your fork and knife intermittently during mealtimes.

Creative, Fun Connection-Building Traditions
• Christmas Question Box: Everyone creates 3 questions to put into the box, and then everyone picks one at random to answer.
• Family Member of the Day: Choose a designated day to celebrate one person intentionally.
• Nature Photo Stories: Each person takes one outdoor photo, then shares the story behind it.
• Family Writing Challenge: Create poems, limericks, haikus or stories from a shared prompt.
• Play, laugh, make fun memories: Encourage imagination, curiosity, mistakes, and silliness.

Finally, I have also spent some Christmases alone, but whether by choice or not, if you’re spending Christmas alone, know that it can still be meaningful. Community events, volunteering, reaching out to support lines, or simply creating your own mindful rituals can bring warmth and connection.

If you are struggling with feelings of loneliness you can:

• Check local churches/community centres for events.
• Visit Action to End Loneliness website here
• Use free helplines such as Samaritans (116 123) website or Shout (text SHOUT to 85258) website.

Some Christmas I spent alone I did some volunteering, which was grounding, connecting, and meaningful.

Christmas doesn’t need to be perfect. It just needs to be intentional. With emotional intelligence, self-compassion and simple mindful practices, you can create a festive season filled with peace, presence, connection and genuine joy.

Remember; You matter! 365 days of the year. Look after You.

Listen to all Mindful Poetic Stories Podcast episodes click here.
or
For more tips and ideas, read my Christmas blog, How to Thrive Through Christmas (here’s Part 1, and Part 2)