We are living in uncertain times. And I’m not just talking about the extraordinary political situation that currently leaves us not knowing who is going to run the country. Jobs are far less secure than in previous decades; banks feel treacherous rather than safe; we worry about education, the health service, the threat of terrorism, volcanish ash — I won’t go on (though I could).
But — if we analyse it a bit more closely — it’s truer to say that modern life is actually more predictable than it was for previous generations. Just one example is the way that women can now control their fertility, planning their families, rather than accepting nature’s random ways. But, to my mind, there are limits to what you need to know. And one of them is the sex of your baby. I am not at all against using scans for health problems and predicting birth defects, but I really didn’t want to know what sex my children were before they were born.
I am curious as to what Psychologies readers think. Are they with most of the pregnant women I am currently working with for whom the question is a no-brainer? Why would you NOT want to know? As they say, you can get used to the idea, especially if it’s not the sex you were hoping for.
But I come at it from a different angle. Having a baby is such a miraculous, mysterious process — and, finally, it’s pretty traumatic too. After going through labour, being passed your tiny, wrinkled baby with the words “It’s a xxx!” is pure reward. The element of surprise makes the pleasure more acute — and I’ve even found some psychological research that (while having nothing to do with pregnancy or gender prediction) claims uncertainty enhances our experiences, making the pleasant experiences more pleasant and the unpleasant more unpleasant. Read this for details.
I also think, it shouldn’t really matter if it is one or the other. Boys are just as wonderful as girls and it’s remarkably short-sighted if some women can’t see beyond the desire to dress up daughters in cute clothes.
What do you think?
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